Tuesday, November 16, 2021

Interviewee to a Great Friend

It was 2007. We met in an office in Delhi. It was in a completely professional environment i.e., a girl by the name Ishita had applied for a job and I was conducting the interviews. The interview happened in a nice, air-conditioned conference room. All this seemed like a perfectly normal thing to occur in a company. Until the miracles of human relationships showed us its magic.

She was tall and strikingly beautiful. She spoke softly, clearly and answered every interview question with tremendous confidence. Her smile bamboozled me no end. I barely listened to her answers, as I was lost in her smile. That is how impressive she was (to look at!). Her intelligence and clarity of thought shone through the discussion.

I informed my VP that she should be hired. The VP thought otherwise and did not select her after his discussions with her. That was the end of that. Or, so it seemed.

Soon after the interview, I thanked Ishita for coming over and then went rushing to her friend who had referred her for the role. This friend, also worked in the same firm. I could not stop raving about Ishita's beauty (in hindsight, a very unprofessional remark to make) and kept saying how intelligent she was. My colleague smiled and said that Ishita was her closest friend and one of the smartest people around. And apparently, in the interim few minutes i.e., from the end of the interview till the time I got to my colleague's desk, Ishita had sent a WhatsApp message to her stating that she was impressed with me as well! Who said only boys check out girls?!

Interestingly, I am from the south of India (a Tamilian from Bangalore), and both these girls are from the east of India (Bengalis living in New Delhi). That is as far as diversity can get with everything different within the country- region, language, culture, dress codes, vegetarian vs non-vegetarian, personality, backgrounds, upbringing, and so on. But when minds and hearts connect, none of these differences come to the surface.

Ishita and I connected like fish in water. I met Ishita's son too, who was a cute kid at the time. We even hung out in a couple of places in Delhi, given that I was reasonably alien to the city. Of course, much after the interview we spoke both in Hindi and in English. I shared this blog page with her and she read many of them. And we pretty much shared our life history with each other. 

But, what was even more intriguing was the mesmerising tone of the Bengali language that I had always admired, and to listen to her speak so well. I was enamoured by the tone, the diction, the musicality of the language and the sheer artistic character of the way she spoke. Still am, to this day.

Ishita taught me what it means to be extraordinarily tough mentally and emotionally, based on all the harsh challenges she faced. I used to feel miserable that I could not do anything to help her resolve those challenges. My respect for her has grown manifold over time, and there is nothing that I will tolerate from anyone who has remotely anything negative to say about her. This lady will smile, and in doing so, will each us how to tackle life. Pure respect!

What is even more fascinating is that we met all of 5 times (at best!). I returned to Bangalore for another job and eventually moved abroad. We have not met since 2007. But the friendship is treasured to this day. It does not take beyond 1 second to reconnect even now. And to think, the interview lasted all of 30 minutes!

It was the most bizarre, yet seemingly the most natural association that ever happened to me. The type of conversations we had certainly is of the type that one can only have with folks who we can confide in, trust blindly, and have the complete confidence of never being judged. 

Since then, every time I conduct an interview, I remember that day in 2007. I have not made a single great friend after that day. I guess that is what is called, 'some scripts are written somewhere else. We are just the characters'.

This experience reinforces the belief that human beings are fundamentally configured to be social. To connect. We can connect at any level, and at any time, and in any situation.

May the miracles of human relationships long continue! And may this friendship that was certainly created by an act of God, in the given rare & improbable circumstances that it started in, long continue!