Sunday, November 02, 2008

The fine line between a relationship and friendship

This might be as good as a Catch-22 situation, which I think many people in our current generation would have been exposed to. Of course, at varying degrees, if I may add i.e what is the line that one draws when one gets along so famously with a member of the opposite gender, and is one who is your greatest ever friend? What sort of a line does one draw in defining the space for oneself, and the space for the sublime friendship? And most importantly, how does one react when the line is breached and enters the realm of a relationship?

I am increasingly convinced that the loss of a friendship, especially a sublime,special and ever-lasting one, is a far greater loss than losing the same person in a relationship. Such relationships with one's greatest friend ends up being a double-edged sword, as it promises such a fantastic future together, only to topple not only the relationship, but also the fantastic camaraderie, that exists between 2 people . I am not trying to generalise here, but I am quite convinced that it is never a good idea to lose one's greatest ever friend to a relationship. That can wreck havoc on the psyche, as the aura of companionship that was so much a part of one's life as friends, gets eroded under the ghost of a relationship.

I think the line between friendship and a relationship with one's greatest friend is incredibly fine. And not too many people are good at reading that line. That can have devastating effects on the psyche. This is more damaging as one gets older, and longs for such companionship, only to find that he/she is no longer a part of one's life - neither as a friend/companion, nor as a partner.

It is much better to salvage pride of a friendship and enjoy the incredible camaraderie of such equations between 2 people from the opposite genders. I am convinced that the agony of losing a friendship, especially, a very special one, is far more damaging and leaves a greater void, than does the agony of the relationship going all wrong.

Friendship! Ah, that sublime relationship that teaches you so much about yourself and makes you an enriched human being. Losing it, can mean, losing the sounding board of your life.